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Failed Pick Up Lines

Started by Aletheia, April 11, 2015, 07:58:38 PM

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Aletheia

    Just for the hell of it, I thought it might be fun to post pick up lines destined to fail or possibly cause you bodily harm.

    All applicants accepted (until someone brings up a case that changes this rule). This includes pick up lines from:



    • Straight Men
    • Straight Women
    • Gay Men
    • Gay Women
    • Bisexuals
    • Any other sexuality that is legal or deemed by first world countries as worthy of being legal


This can include quotes, your own personal lines, memes, things your friends have said, things you heard strangers say, or even advice from the magic 8 ball.

To start off, here's a few:




QuoteIt's a good thing same-sex marriage is legal here, because I'm already planning our wedding.

I know you think I'm sexy, I know you think I'm fine, but just like all the other guys get a number and wait in line.

Do you know what'd look good on you? Me.


Quote from: Jakenessif you believe in the supernatural, you do not understand modern science. Period.

Mike Cl

I really don't see why any of those lines above are bad. ??  I like em.
Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able?<br />Then he is not omnipotent,<br />Is he able but not willing?<br />Then whence cometh evil?<br />Is he neither able or willing?<br />Then why call him god?

stromboli

"So.... what do you say, baby? Your condo or my mobile home?"

hrdlr110

Wow, I love your eyes, they're so big I can see my reflection.....don't move.
Q for theists; how can there be freewill and miracles? And, how can prayer exist in an environment as regimented as "gods plan"?

"I'm a polyatheist, there are many gods I don't believe in." - Dan Fouts

Aletheia

Quote from: Jakenessif you believe in the supernatural, you do not understand modern science. Period.

kilodelta

Teacher, would you help me with my bonework?
Faith: pretending to know things you don't know

trdsf

My favorite pickup/putdown combo is:

"That sweater would look great in a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor."

"So would you."
"My faith in the Constitution is whole, it is complete, it is total, and I am not going to sit here and be an idle spectator to the diminution, the subversion, the destruction of the Constitution." -- Barbara Jordan

Valigarmander

Quote from: Aletheia on April 11, 2015, 09:56:00 PM

I'm definitely going to use this one.

"Are you a vampire? Cause I have some wood I want to shove in your chest."

Shiranu

"If I were an enzyme, I'd be DNA helicase so I could unzip your genes."

"How about me and you go back to my place and form a covalent bond?"

"If I was an endoplasmic reticulum, how would you want me: smooth or rough?"

Note; my biology professor has a thing for these super corny lines.
Gloire à Hélios y Perséphone, pardonnez, Demeter et Mat Zemlya.

Youssuf Ramadan

Sit on my face and I'll guess your weight.

Get your coat, love. You've pulled.

Do you sleep on your front? No? Well then can I?


Gawdzilla Sama

"I'm dying of AIDS and I'm looking for one last fling."
We 'new atheists' have a reputation for being militant, but make no mistake  we didn't start this war. If you want to place blame put it on the the religious zealots who have been poisoning the minds of the  young for a long long time."
PZ Myers

Mike Cl

All of my pick-up lines failed--so every single thing I said to females to get them interested would fit into this category.  So all of these lines (well, most, anyway) would be a step up. :))
Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able?<br />Then he is not omnipotent,<br />Is he able but not willing?<br />Then whence cometh evil?<br />Is he neither able or willing?<br />Then why call him god?

Solitary

My name is Bill, what is yours? Buzz off weirdo. Must have been a lesbian.  :eek: :biggrin2:
There is nothing more frightful than ignorance in action.

Gawdzilla Sama

I personally don't use pick up lines in bar. I just sit quietly and lick my eyebrows.
We 'new atheists' have a reputation for being militant, but make no mistake  we didn't start this war. If you want to place blame put it on the the religious zealots who have been poisoning the minds of the  young for a long long time."
PZ Myers

Solitary

There is nothing more frightful than ignorance in action.