Another New Guy

[Solomon Zorn]

Hello! I just discovered this forum, and haven't had time to read a lot yet, but I already feel right at home. By way of introduction, I would like to share a little about myself.

I am 47, and was born and raised in northwest Indiana, about 15 miles from the southern tip of Lake Michigan. I used to be a rather fanatical Christian, even attending bible college for two years (1985-87) with the intention of becoming a preacher.

In 1995 I had what I call an awakening, but which has been diagnosed as schizophrenia. It is that experience (hearing voices etc.) that has convinced me that what we call the spiritual world, is just an unexplained part of the natural world, and may even someday be explained by mathematics, just as everything else will.

I now consider myself an atheist, and I am much happier. I even think my moral compass is much improved as a result.

Most of my family is very religious, many even being preachers. I do have two close atheist friends, but neither is interested in discussing this kind of stuff. So I am really glad to find this community, and I look forward to some stimulating conversation.

[Plu]

Welcome aboard :)

[Farroc]

Hello.
[youtube:1sfl4g5t]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hXCKLJGLENs[/youtube:1sfl4g5t]

What is it?          It's a stew.








Do with that greeting what you will. Just don't explain it to any lizards.(They won't understand!)

[stromboli]

Welcome.

[mykcob4]

You heard voices then decided to become an atheist? Wow, sounds a little Joseph Smith to me.

[Solomon Zorn]

You heard voices then decided to become an atheist? Wow, sounds a little Joseph Smith to me.

Hah! Yeah, I guess I'm the antithesis of a religious convert. :-D

[Colanth]

Maybe religious belief is just a particular form of schizophrenia?

Welcome.

[Solitary]

Welcome aboard Solomon Zorn! You will fit in here very good. :shock:  Figuring out that the voices were not real is an amazing intellectual thing to do like John Forbes (A Beautiful Mind) did with his visions.  =D>  If you are taking medicine for your problem don't quit. Solitary

[Solomon Zorn]

Welcome aboard Solomon Zorn! You will fit in here very good. :shock:  Figuring out that the voices were not real is an amazing intellectual thing to do like John Forbes (A Beautiful Mind) did with his visions.  =D>  If you are taking medicine for your problem don't quit. Solitary

Thanks Solitary! I do take medicines for it, and they help a lot. But I'm not convinced that they were not real. Only that they were not supernatural. It would be a long explanation, but the short version is that I think there is more to the human experience, for some of us, than just what is visible. :-$  It's been a wild trip at times though.

[Solomon Zorn]

Maybe religious belief is just a particular form of schizophrenia?

Welcome.

Maybe not schizophrenia, but a delusion to be sure.

[Solitary]

Welcome aboard Solomon Zorn! You will fit in here very good. :shock:  Figuring out that the voices were not real is an amazing intellectual thing to do like John Forbes (A Beautiful Mind) did with his visions.  =D>  If you are taking medicine for your problem don't quit. Solitary

Thanks Solitary! I do take medicines for it, and they help a lot. But I'm not convinced that they were not real. Only that they were not supernatural. It would be a long explanation, but the short version is that I think there is more to the human experience, for some of us, than just what is visible. :-$  It's been a wild trip at times though.

I accidently (honest) drank a glass of coke with rum in it that also had a psychedelic in it that was a hundred times more powerful than LSD and I didn't know what was happening to me. I finally went to an out clinic at our mental hospital because I thought I was going insane. I saw my son's pictures on the wall turn into gargoyles and walked around the room moaning while I saw myself on the couch crying.

I ran into the bathroom and splashed water on my face and when I looked in the mirror I couldn't tell if I was in the mirror or outside of it and then it switched back and forth rapidly. My wife got a nurse from down stairs to help me. I went outside and walked through glass and cactus needles watching a green light. When it turned red I went through space and time filled with psychedelic patterns.  It was not fun to me.

I had every kind of psychological test one can have, hypnosis, IQ tests, electroencephalograms, ink blot tests etc.  and all they could say is that I was unsane, not insane. I only think they said that was because I blew them away on every test. They finally got a psychologists from California to look at my electroencephalograms because they showed I was dead. :shock:

  He said he has only seen that with religious gurus that meditate which is exactly what I was doing. After two weeks I was back to normal after taking drugs for it. I'm 71 now and not that long ago I found out I have PTSD that my present doctor figured out I had all my adult life. I no longer have free floating anxiety, panic attacks that are truly a living hell I wish on no one! I also have no violent out bursts and am very relaxed now.

Take care! You must have a very strong intellect to realize they were delusions, even if you're not sure. They are, and I have no doubt which is rare for me. Solitary

[Brian37]

Be sure to barbecue kittens, record the NFL without their permission and rip the tags off of your mattress.

[_Xenu_]

He said he has only seen that with religious gurus that meditate which is exactly what I was doing. After two weeks I was back to normal after taking drugs for it. I'm 71 now and not that long ago I found out I have PTSD that my present doctor figured out I had all my adult life. I no longer have free floating anxiety, panic attacks that are truly a living hell I wish on no one! I also have no violent out bursts and am very relaxed now.

There's no way an outsider could ever grasp how terrifying a stress and trigger induced PTSD mental meltdown can be. I had one about five years ago and still think about it every day and shudder when I do. Even 100 proof vodka couldn't make it stop...

[Solomon Zorn]

...He said he has only seen that with religious gurus that meditate which is exactly what I was doing...

The last time the whole thing got to an extreme for me, the voices insisted that I not eat, not sleep, not move, not make a sound, not even think. I tried to accommodate this with varying levels of success for nearly a month. At one point I was able to raise the volume of a far away train going by until it sounded like it was right outside my window, and the voices of people yelling at me seemingly coming from around the neighborhood were telling me it was too loud. :shock:  It was magical/terrifying. I lost 27 pounds before I ended up in a psych ward. But I wouldn't trade the experience for anything.

Now I don't believe anything the voices tell me, but I do believe that they were/are the voices of other people just messing with my mind.

I do hope, though, that my mental status won't prejudice people toward anything I might post that is unrelated to such things.

[PickelledEggs]

Welcome! =-)