My depression

[Jannabear]

I don't know if this is in the right section, if it isn't feel free to move it.
A huge trigger warning for this (And not the feminist kind of trigger warning, an actual trigger warning)
I've been dealing with severe depression lately.
I live in a house with someone who used to psychically and emotionally abuse me.
I rarely see my friends.
I have severe body image issues
My doctor is ignoring me about my hormones (I'm transgender)
And I got kicked out of my school.
I've nearly relapsed on self harming and I have only a few people to go to, but I'm to scared to.
Someone please give me advice, I'm crying right now.

[PickelledEggs]

Eh. Technically it's "Personal matters", but General Discussion isn't too far either. No biggie.

I don't know what "psychically" abused means... but referring to your friends, are there any you can see? I would recommend reaching out to them. Also, I would recommend seeing a professional. Friends know you best. And when you're in need, friends can be the best support, sometimes even better than blood-family.

That's all I have. Maybe someone else might have more/better advice, but I definitely recommend those two things as your top priority. Spend time with friends/see a professional.

[Dionysiou]

Yeh, you gotta get out of your head. Someone in your position can easily fall into a spiral. The fact that you're reaching out online says a lot as it is. I'd advise talking to a friend or family member who loves you but in the absence of that, a professional. You're literally torturing yourself by staying quiet. I know this is an atheist forum and i'm not even religious but a school chaplain or church pastor would also be of help to you. If nothing less, they will offer support and sympathy.

[PickelledEggs]

Someone in your position can easily fall into a spiral.

This.
Don't fall in to a spiral anymore than you already are. You need to get out of your head. I wouldn't recommend talking to a chaplain or priest... because you're trans, but I would seek out a shoulder and an ear of a close friend/family member that loves you.

As someone that has been in many horrible spiraling depressions as I have can tell you, as low as you feel right now, it just means it's all up hill from here... or is it down hill? .... It gets better is what I'm trying to say.

(up hill is moving up, but down hill has more ease... I don't know which I'm supposed to use...)

[Jannabear]

This.
Don't fall in to a spiral anymore than you already are. You need to get out of your head. I wouldn't recommend talking to a chaplain or priest... because you're trans, but I would seek out a shoulder and an ear of a close friend/family member that loves you.

As someone that has been in many horrible spiraling depressions as I have can tell you, as low as you feel right now, it just means it's all up hill from here... or is it down hill? .... It gets better is what I'm trying to say.

(up hill is moving up, but down hill has more ease... I don't know which I'm supposed to use...)

I'm tired of crying everyday because the few people I have a connection with I never see, and I have severe body image issues.

[PickelledEggs]

I'm tired of crying everyday because the few people I have a connection with I never see, and I have severe body image issues.

Your body image issues is something I cannot help you with. All I am going to be able to say is be happy with who you are as a person, and as long as you're healthy, that's all that matters, and if you're not healthy, that is something that can be easily changed with diet/exercise. If you're body image issues are coming from the fact that you were born the wrong sex, that is something I, as a straight man, cannot help with though, since I do not know what you are going through... at all. Especially since I only know you through the forum slightly. Friends will be able to help much better. If you can't see them in person, skype them so you can see their face.

You're going to have to trust me that you need to talk with your friends. Even though I don't know you that well, I know from experience that depression eases quickly when you have friends to help you through it. Don't make excuses to talking to your friends. That is what a friend is. Someone that cares about you. Your friends don't care about your body. They like you for who you are.

[TrueStory]

  You are in a category of high risk for suicide with a list like that and I hope you can get some help if possible through friends, professionals or maybe a support group near you for abuse survivors or transgender people.  Are you near a major city? 

How old are you?  I would recommend moving out of your situation if possible, probably the most important first step. 

[Baruch]

You might try getting out of the house, into nature or the anonymous public.  Go to the park, visit a library, where you can get away for awhile.

[aitm]

There are several transgender hotlines. Give them a shot at helping. Google brought up quite a few. Good luck.

[AllPurposeAtheist]

Jannabear, I struggled with suicidal depression for many years and tried many times to end my life. Nothing ever seemed to help and the so called professionals were even less than useless, but the good news is that I finally came to grips with it somewhere along the way I can not tell you how it works, but I do know that depression comes and goes. It doesn't last forever. It certainly can feel like it lasts forever and when you're in the downward spiral hope just goes out the window.
Time however is your friend. The older you get the closer you get toward the day that you're going to just die from natural causes. There's no need to rush the process.
As for being around abusive people..get out and away from them even if it means living in a homeless shelter or even an abandoned house somewhere. I did that. Believe it or not many cities offer quite a few resources for homeless people though certainly not all of them do. I had to go to another city to another shelter where I didn't know a single soul, but that was after I did some digging on what cities offer the best services.
A big part of it is just learning how like the person that you are. You have to accept who you are.
I have no magic answers because there are no magic answers. They don't exist,but you exist so you have to find reasons to exist and like the person you are and want to be.
It sure sounds cliche, but your existence really is inside your head. Find the things that make you happy and do them,but it sure sounds like you really need to get away from the people who are abusive to you.

[gentle_dissident]

I have severe body image issues

I've just seen your feet. You have nice feet.

[aitm]

O-oh.....we gonna go off into weird fetish land?

[gentle_dissident]

If that's your thing. Your place or mine?

[Jannabear]

I've just seen your feet. You have nice feet.

<3 : ].

[aitm]

Oh please you two, get a podiatrist…..lol…get it? LOLOLOL



sometimes I crack me up.