People Going Nuts Over "Noah".....Before its Release?

[Gawdzilla Sama]

Yeah, I've seen all the Noah's Ark movies and "proofs". They still can't prove how it got to like a 14,000 foot altitude. That is a tough one.

"There is no supposed "flaw" in the Ark story that would make me not believe it is 100% true!" (From one of my relatives I don't speak to when I can avoid it.)

Anyway, the Ark would have to carry food for:

The time the animals were housed before the rain started.
40 days of rain.
150 days of floating around aimlessly.
The amount of time it took for the land to recover enough to support the herbivores.
The amount of time it took for the herbivores to recover enough for the predators to kill one every few days. (The sustainable level of herbivores is a math thing, and I don't do math.)

Bottom line, a long, long time.

Maybe the Ark was a tardis?

[josephpalazzo]

Unless Noah traveled all the way to Australia to get a pair of kangaroos, this story is full of shit.

[Gawdzilla Sama]

Unless Noah traveled all the way to Australia to get a pair of kangaroos, this story is full of shit.

And koalas, and the eucalyptus trees they feed on exclusively.

But of course you've heard the theory that the animals were blasted back to Oz by local volcanic eruptions.

Sounds legit.

[SGOS]

Given the epic task of capturing two of every kind of animal, it wouldn't surprise me of Noah may have simply slipped in a few extra camels and put them down as horses and giraffes on his ledger.  With an undertaking that big, even large companies with an endless supply of manpower tend to cut a few corners here and there.

[leo]

Given the epic task of capturing two of every kind of animal, it wouldn't surprise me of Noah may have simply slipped in a few extra camels and put them down as horses and giraffes on his ledger.  With an undertaking that big, even large companies with an endless supply of manpower tend to cut a few corners here and there.

Like I said  in the other thread Chuck Norris sneezing was the real cause of the flood. Chuck Norris build the ark with his own hands in less than a hour to save all human beings ( he knows what happen in every planet after he sneeze ) but Noah was a asshole . He don't care about human beings. He fill the ark with animals instead.

[stromboli]

Unless Noah traveled all the way to Australia to get a pair of kangaroos, this story is full of shit.

And polar bears. And South/Central America for the Coati Mundis. Got to save the Coati Mundis.   

[Gawdzilla Sama]

And polar bears. And South/Central America for the Coati Mundis. Got to save the Coati Mundis.   

Plus putting all the fish in the right spots in the oceans.

"Dude, this is turning into a logistical nightmare! How do we get Emperor penguins to a continent we don't know exists?"

"You're right. Let's turn this thing into a floating casino and brothel."

[leo]

Plus putting all the fish in the right spots in the oceans.

"Dude, this is turning into a logistical nightmare! How do we get Emperor penguins to a continent we don't know exists?"

"You're right. Let's turn this thing into a floating casino and brothel."

I like my chucknorris version better.

[stromboli]

I'm personally wondering how you keep a boat load of herbivores separate from top predators like lions and tigers and bears, oh my!

And Howler monkeys. I've got to think they could get obnoxious real fast.

[Gawdzilla Sama]

I'm personally wondering how you keep a boat load of herbivores separate from top predators like lions and tigers and bears, oh my!

And Howler monkeys. I've got to think they could get obnoxious real fast.

How about the creatures that use other species as incubators for their young? Or cuckoos?

[leo]

I'm personally wondering how you keep a boat load of herbivores separate from top predators like lions and tigers and bears, oh my!

And Howler monkeys. I've got to think they could get obnoxious real fast.

Yep how the hell the herbivores survive that long in the ark with tiger and lions? What the hell the carnivores eat?

[stromboli]

How about the creatures that use other species as incubators for their young? Or cuckoos?

And parasites-ewww. 

[Gawdzilla Sama]

                                                                                                                                                   Yep how the hell the herbivores survive that long in the ark with tiger and lions? What the hell the carnivores eat?

Tofu.

[Gawdzilla Sama]

And parasites-ewww. 

I don't think they're taking in-laws.

[stromboli]

Yeah, but somehow we still have in laws. God is CRUEL.