Why I am a Wood Elf in Skyrim despite being a powerlifting fanatic.

Started by Primal, June 30, 2023, 05:08:40 AM

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Primal

It's because I'm short in real life like wood elves. I'm an avid, short powerlifter.

I'm also very horny, and wood elves in the Elder Scrolls world are like rabbits.

You would think I'd be an orc. lol

Unbeliever

God Not Found
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the_antithesis

Quote from: Primal on June 30, 2023, 05:08:40 AMIt's because I'm short in real life like wood elves. I'm an avid, short powerlifter.

Those are quite common.

Like how guys with tiny dicks buy expensive cars.

Primal

Quote from: the_antithesis on June 30, 2023, 11:52:18 AMThose are quite common.

Like how guys with tiny dicks buy expensive cars.


I've always heard of that but is it true? So for many guys, the only reason they spend lots of money on those expensive cars is to overcompensate in that way? lol

Primal

Quote from: Unbeliever on June 30, 2023, 11:06:29 AMIf you were an orc you could call yourself Mork... 🤣

I don't get it. What's a Mork? Why would I call myself that?

the_antithesis

If you have a big dick, you don't need a personality.

the_antithesis

Quote from: Primal on June 30, 2023, 12:07:44 PMI don't get it. What's a Mork? Why would I call myself that?


Na-noo Na-noo.

Gawdzilla Sama

When they wrote the scripts they put "Mork speaks" where his lines went. Totally improv. Man was a genius.
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Unbeliever

Quote from: the_antithesis on June 30, 2023, 11:52:18 AMThose are quite common.

Like how guys with tiny dicks buy expensive cars.


Oh, now I finally know why all the cars I've owned have been ready for the scrap heap. 🤠
God Not Found
"There is a sucker born-again every minute." - C. Spellman

Mr.Obvious

Only those with the junk of a hunk drive a hunk of junk?
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Sargon The Grape

The wood elves of The Elder Scrolls are pretty savage. Their religion requires them to fully process the body of any kill (i.e. eat and/or make tools) within three days. In war, they starve themselves before battle so they'll be able to eat all of the dead on both sides.
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Mike Cl

Quote from: Hijiri Byakuren on June 30, 2023, 05:41:41 PMThe wood elves of The Elder Scrolls are pretty savage. Their religion requires them to fully process the body of any kill (i.e. eat and/or make tools) within three days. In war, they starve themselves before battle so they'll be able to eat all of the dead on both sides.
And they are the best archers in the game.  In my version of Skyrim, I can make my wood elf as thin or buffed, as I want.
Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able?<br />Then he is not omnipotent,<br />Is he able but not willing?<br />Then whence cometh evil?<br />Is he neither able or willing?<br />Then why call him god?

Primal

Quote from: Hijiri Byakuren on June 30, 2023, 05:41:41 PMThe wood elves of The Elder Scrolls are pretty savage. Their religion requires them to fully process the body of any kill (i.e. eat and/or make tools) within three days. In war, they starve themselves before battle so they'll be able to eat all of the dead on both sides.

My Oblivion wood elf lives in Cyrodiil. He's way too sophisticated to be a cannibal.

My Skyrim wood elf is the wealthiest, most powerful person in Tamriel, both politically and physically. Greatest archer, strongest axe fighter, Dragonborn, et cetera. He has risen above his lowly cousins from that annoying Valenwood forest.

Blackleaf

Quote from: Primal on June 30, 2023, 12:07:02 PMI've always heard of that but is it true? So for many guys, the only reason they spend lots of money on those expensive cars is to overcompensate in that way? lol

Yes. I believe research has showed that there was a correlation between perceived dick size and interest in sports cars. I think they had some men who were told they were smaller than average, despite their actual size, and it consistently led to a greater interest in sports cars. Compensation is real.

Coincidentally, I drive a little Nissan Versa Note.
"Oh, wearisome condition of humanity,
Born under one law, to another bound;
Vainly begot, and yet forbidden vanity,
Created sick, commanded to be sound."
--Fulke Greville--

Primal

Quote from: Blackleaf on June 30, 2023, 06:39:31 PMYes. I believe research has showed that there was a correlation between perceived dick size and interest in sports cars. I think they had some men who were told they were smaller than average, despite their actual size, and it consistently led to a greater interest in sports cars. Compensation is real.

Coincidentally, I drive a little Nissan Versa Note.

I drive a beat-up 2005 Sedan.