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Extraordinary Claims => Religion General Discussion => Christianity => Topic started by: ApostateLois on September 16, 2013, 12:54:33 PM

Title: "Holy" water is contaminated with poop!
Post by: ApostateLois on September 16, 2013, 12:54:33 PM
HAHAHAHAHHAAA! //http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-2419851/Not-pure-Most-holy-water-contaminated-faecal-matter-harmful-health.html I find it hilarious that the water blessed by God contains germs that make people sick. Is this just one of God's little jokes?

QuoteAustrian researchers have discovered that church fonts contain very high levels of bacteria and a majority of water samples from holy sources contain fecal matter.

Experts from the Institute of Hygiene and Applied Immunology at the Medical University of Vienna analyzed the water in 21 holy springs in Austria and in 18 fonts in Vienna at various times during the year, the Daily Mail reported.

They found that 86 percent of water samples from holy sources contain fecal matter, and every milliliter of holy water contained up to 62 million bacteria, none of it safe to drink.
Title: Re: "Holy" water is contaminated with poop!
Post by: stromboli on September 16, 2013, 01:03:00 PM
"and let us, therefore, sprinkle it on the heads of newborn children to baptize them into a new world of disease and death......"
Title: Re: "Holy" water is contaminated with poop!
Post by: Valigarmander on September 16, 2013, 01:21:52 PM
I always knew holy water was full of shit.
Title: Re: "Holy" water is contaminated with poop!
Post by: ApostateLois on September 16, 2013, 01:36:00 PM
Christians are no smarter than those Hindus who bathe in the stinking, filthy Ganges River in the belief it will cleanse them.
Title: Re: "Holy" water is contaminated with poop!
Post by: Youssuf Ramadan on September 16, 2013, 04:19:07 PM
Quote from: "Valigarmander"I always knew holy water was full of shit.

Wakka wakka wakka!  =D>  :lol:
Title: Re: "Holy" water is contaminated with poop!
Post by: LikelyToBreak on September 16, 2013, 04:35:43 PM
You have to admit, it makes sense.  Or did I mean scents?  :-k   Well, no never mind.  Aphid poop or poopy holy water, it is all blessed by God.
Title: Re: "Holy" water is contaminated with poop!
Post by: kilodelta on September 16, 2013, 05:08:34 PM
Family Guy had an episode where Stewie got sick from tainted holy water...
Title: Re: "Holy" water is contaminated with poop!
Post by: AllPurposeAtheist on September 16, 2013, 06:38:35 PM
It might be OK if mixed with good bourbon and you were on a month long bender..but even then.... I'll have to pass.
It's not the holy shit in it, but I've tasted Texas water before and friends, it's not good.
Title: Re: "Holy" water is contaminated with poop!
Post by: PickelledEggs on September 16, 2013, 08:32:05 PM
Quote from: "Valigarmander"I always knew holy water was full of shit.
Beat me to it...
Title: Re: "Holy" water is contaminated with poop!
Post by: stromboli on September 16, 2013, 10:01:37 PM
Quote from: "Youssuf Ramadan"
Quote from: "Valigarmander"I always knew holy water was full of shit.

Wakka wakka wakka!  =D>  :lol:

The correct spelling is Wocka! Wocka! Wocka!
Title: Re: "Holy" water is contaminated with poop!
Post by: ApostateLois on September 16, 2013, 10:49:50 PM
Reminds me of one of the best commercials ever:

[youtube:nue1ibvc]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xVzrpMzfBj0[/youtube:nue1ibvc]
Title: Re: "Holy" water is contaminated with poop!
Post by: PickelledEggs on September 17, 2013, 01:27:04 AM
Quote from: "ApostateLois"Reminds me of one of the best commercials ever:

Writer posted a YouTube video (//http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xVzrpMzfBj0)
There is no way this is real.^

and then I googled it. and you can actually buy it. They'll sell anything won't they  :rollin:
Title: Re: "Holy" water is contaminated with poop!
Post by: Atheon on September 17, 2013, 02:29:46 PM
Holy shit!
Title: Re: "Holy" water is contaminated with poop!
Post by: aitm on September 17, 2013, 02:32:48 PM
Yeah, I posted that on FB with "Holy water full of crap" and proceed to laugh my butt off. Now I get to see how many "friends" I pissed on.
Title: Re: "Holy" water is contaminated with poop!
Post by: ApostateLois on September 18, 2013, 07:42:25 PM
I feel sorry for all the little babies and children being baptized in toxic water. They'll get sick, and the parents will have no idea why.
Title: Re: "Holy" water is contaminated with poop!
Post by: Hydra009 on September 18, 2013, 10:40:49 PM
Quote from: "ApostateLois"I feel sorry for all the little babies and children being baptized in toxic water. They'll get sick, and the parents will have no idea why.
On the plus side, the parents are likely ardent materialists who will no doubt rush 'em to the hospital and not try some magic cure or something.
Title: Re: "Holy" water is contaminated with poop!
Post by: Solitary on September 19, 2013, 12:21:01 AM
I want to know how it got poop in it.  :shock:  :lol:  Solitary
Title: Re: "Holy" water is contaminated with poop!
Post by: Hydra009 on September 19, 2013, 12:51:52 AM
Quote from: "Solitary"I want to know how it got poop in it.  :shock:  :lol:  Solitary
Pretty self-explanatory.  Person with dirty hands sticks their hands in the font = contamination.
Title: Re: "Holy" water is contaminated with poop!
Post by: ApostateLois on September 19, 2013, 06:24:30 PM
I think it also applies to natural springs and wells from which people draw water to be used in their rituals. Chances are that these sites have been contaminated with feces and pesticides from farm runoff, and pose a huge danger to anyone who drinks it.
Title: Re: "Holy" water is contaminated with poop!
Post by: Sal1981 on September 20, 2013, 07:18:25 PM
Quote from: "Valigarmander"I always knew holy water was full of shit.
rofl
Title: Re: "Holy" water is contaminated with poop!
Post by: PickelledEggs on September 20, 2013, 08:06:31 PM
Quote from: "Solitary"I want to know how it got poop in it.  :shock:  :lol:  Solitary
I want to know how to get MORE poop in it.
Title: Re: "Holy" water is contaminated with poop!
Post by: AllPurposeAtheist on September 20, 2013, 09:09:16 PM
Psssssst.. The secret ingredient in sacramental wine. :-$
Title: Re: "Holy" water is contaminated with poop!
Post by: PickelledEggs on September 20, 2013, 09:31:42 PM
Quote from: "AllPurposeAtheist"Psssssst.. The secret ingredient in sacramental wine. :-$
I always wondered why I tasted the distinct aftertaste of... aftertaste.
Title: Re: "Holy" water is contaminated with poop!
Post by: ApostateLois on September 20, 2013, 09:44:38 PM
Quote from: "PickelledEggs"
Quote from: "Solitary"I want to know how it got poop in it.  :shock:  :lol:  Solitary
I want to know how to get MORE poop in it.

Churches don't usually have guards at night, that I know of. Take a dump in the baptismal pool.
Title: Re: "Holy" water is contaminated with poop!
Post by: AllPurposeAtheist on September 21, 2013, 09:10:34 AM
The river of shit brothers and sisters! Dunk your heads in sewers and be cleansed!
Everyone knows poopoo heads are gods favorites. :)