The question that I get asked by Christians mostly. This is their way of trying to scare me into believing the bullshit laced text that is all religion. I usually just say "What if 2 plus 2 didn't equal 4", to which they usually respond "But it does." which sets me up for a highly cocky "EXACTLY". I've been thinking a lot lately about what I would say if all the bullshit was actually true. What would I say if the second after I died I was talking to God. I'd probably ask why shit on earth is so fucked up. War, hunger, sickness, Rush Limbaugh, etc... Christians do have a good point if you look past all the horseshit for a second. If they're right I'm fucked, but if I'm right not shit happens to them. I think I'll take my chances :rollin:
That phrases pisses me off like Hitler babies because christians usually save that for the end of the argument to try and turn a loss, or at least a stalemate, into a win. Someone pulls that shit on me, I go off on them. It's almost temping to become a famous atheist just so I can get into a big debate with some apologist and then yell the fuck at him for trying to pull that shit. That and getting to rape people at conferences, apparently.
If I'm wrong, God would love me for using the brain he gave me instead of kissing His ass. :shock: :rollin: Solitary
If I'm wrong, I plan to ask God how the genocide of the Native Americans fits into his plan.
Quote from: "ZachyFTW"The question that I get asked by Christians mostly. This is their way of trying to scare me into believing the bullshit laced text that is all religion. I usually just say "What if 2 plus 2 didn't equal 4", to which they usually respond "But it does." which sets me up for a highly cocky "EXACTLY". I've been thinking a lot lately about what I would say if all the bullshit was actually true. What would I say if the second after I died I was talking to God. I'd probably ask why shit on earth is so fucked up. War, hunger, sickness, Rush Limbaugh, etc... Christians do have a good point if you look past all the horseshit for a second. If they're right I'm fucked, but if I'm right not shit happens to them. I think I'll take my chances :rollin:
We get this question on the forum all the time. "What if you're wrong, isn't better to be safe than sorry?" It's a nonstarter. The thing is there is a multitude of what ifs. In the Marine Corps we have a statement for what ifs. "What if grasshoppers had .45s, then birds wouldn't fuck with them." What if there is a purple cow running everything and YOU christians are praying to the wrong thing? I don't buy this better to be safe than sorry crap. In my college speech class a particular young girl gave a speech that amounted to: "We should all follow god's rule because society would be better off. We should teach our children to be good christians because society would be better off." I put it to her that society has been teaching that crap for centuries and it hasn't produced better societies. There is no god's rule, only rules made up by people saying that some god has dictated it. She was pissed.
I think, no I know the best thing is for people to use logic and understanding to make up their own mind. That the god theory has no basis in fact or logic. That the theist have to brainwash children to perpetuate their nonsense.
I'm not a gambler, so if there's a 1 in 8000 chance to avoid a bad afterlife by dedicating my whole life to a gamble, then I'm just going to say "thanks but no thanks".
I've got a list of questions I'd ask any god if my atheism is shown wrong, depending on which god it is.
That last clause is important to my usual response, which is, "I bet Zeus will be upset" -- thus underlining the issue that they too could be wrong about their choice of deity.
Quote from: "the_antithesis"That phrases pisses me off like Hitler babies... .
LOL! I've never heard that expression before.
No one has ever asked me "what if you're wrong?" There are several reasons why this phrase doesn't really mean anything but I think I would respond "Do you think God could tell if I was faking faith?"
The Christian phrase that irks me is "Christians aren't perfect, just forgiven."
Quote from: "mykcob4"We get this question on the forum all the time. "What if you're wrong, isn't better to be safe than sorry?" It's a nonstarter.
If it was just a matter of being a good person, what's the problem? But then they say, "You have to believe, or you go to Hell." The problem there is that belief is not a choice. You can go to church and memorize the 10 Commandments, but you still get a one way ticket to Hell if you don't believe.
At one time I wanted to believe, I read the Bible and prayed, but the more I did those things, the less I believed, because the more I learned about it, the more it sounded like nonsense. I can't change that. It sounds like nonsense and there's no way to believe it doesn't sound like nonsense. And try as I might, I just not wired to believe something that sounds like nonsense.
"Ahh, but it's not nonsense," they say, "It's totally real." Well, so they say. I just don't see the evidence. Evidence would help a lot. Then it might not sound like nonsense if there were some proper evidence. But nope! You've gotta believe.
What if they're wrong, and the real god sends all Christians to hell no matter how they've lived?
Quote from: "GSOgymrat"The Christian phrase that irks me is "Christians aren't perfect, just forgiven."
Not forgiven by the only ones who matter - the ones they've wronged.
What if a hooker with breasts on her back you were fucking and suddenly she gina snapped your dick in half and you bleed to death because you were busy feeling her back tits when all she wanted was your wallet.
"What if" yea, stupid argument. Credulous people thought the sun was a god. Credulous people thought the earth was flat.
What if I am wrong.. Well if I get the chance to speak to the Christian god afterwards, I'll try to explain the situation slowly in order for him to comprehend, since he published the most dense book ever.
In all seriousness though, there are way too many gods to count, so before the Christian comes at you, you come at him or her with the same question.
What If I'm wrong? Then I will have some explaining to Xenu.
still doesn't mean there is a christian god.
> If they're right I'm fucked, but if I'm right not shit happens to them.
Well, no. Google "pascal's wager refuted."
In short, this is a faulty dilemma. Their claim is that either the god they believe in, with the rules they believe in, exists, or no god at all exists. There are many other possibilities.
What if they are wrong, and the First Catholics are right? Then they are going to Hell. What if they are wrong and the Seventh Day Adventists are right? Then they are going to Hell. Then there's the Jehovah's Witnesses, Mormons, and myriad other Christian denominations.
What if they're wrong and the Muslims are right? The Hindus? Zoroastrians? What if Thor is the true god? Zeus? Any one or more of the thousands of gods people have invented?
It's also false because, if you believe just to avoid Hell, then you really don't believe. God certainly can't be so stupid as to be fooled by someone's pretending to believe.
According to Matt 21:22, if you believe, everything you pray for will happen. If someone posing Pascal's Wager to you prays and the thing asked for doesn't happen, then he doesn't really believe, and is going to Hell. The Bible quotes Jesus as saying, "Sell all that ye have, and give the money to the poor." If someone really believed, he would do that. How many of the Christians who pose PW to you have done that?
Frank
What if I'm wrong?
Been saying this for years and years:
If the pagans are right - I'm going to have a great next lifetime cause I worked damn hard to be a good person during this one. Karma is my friend. I am good to go!
If the christians are right - that's ok too. For I'd stack my life against a pious christian any day of the week. My life speaks for itself. And I've a few questions for the man in the sky anyway. I am good to go!
And if the atheists are right - I'm still good to go. Cause I leave lots of good behind me.
It just doesn't matter. If you put your head on your pillow at night knowing you did your best as much as possible - any afterlife or none atall is just fine any way you slice it!!! :-D
Quote from: "ZachyFTW"The question that I get asked by Christians mostly. This is their way of trying to scare me into believing the bullshit laced text that is all religion. I usually just say "What if 2 plus 2 didn't equal 4", to which they usually respond "But it does." which sets me up for a highly cocky "EXACTLY". I've been thinking a lot lately about what I would say if all the bullshit was actually true. What would I say if the second after I died I was talking to God. I'd probably ask why shit on earth is so fucked up. War, hunger, sickness, Rush Limbaugh, etc... Christians do have a good point if you look past all the horseshit for a second. If they're right I'm fucked, but if I'm right not shit happens to them. I think I'll take my chances :rollin:
I always say the same thing to everyone that says something like this to me.
"If you prove to me that what I am saying is wrong, than I will humbly ditch what I am saying and agree with you"
My answer is, "Better to burn in hell for eternity than have to worship that genocidal, baby killing, slave driving, jealous, homophobic, hypocritical bastard of a God even one time, which the holy bible teaches about." :evil:
But, some of your guys answers are pretty good too. I especially like FrankDK's quoting of scripture to show them their own hypocrisy. =D>
I usually just start screaming at them about how unless they repent immediately, THE HAMMER OF THOR'S VENGEANCE WILL REIGN DOWN UPON YOU LIKE THE THUNDER OF A THOUSANDS STORMS! THE SCREECH OF A MILLION VALKYRIES WILL SPLIT YOUR EARDRUMS IN TWINE AND SHATTER YOUR FINGERNAILS INTO A FINE DUST!
THE CHILDREN OF BURI WILL RIP YOU INTO SHREDS, AND TYR WILL LEAD AN ONSLAUGHT AGAINST YOU THE LIKES OF WHICH YOU'VE NEVER SEEN BEFORE.
THE FIRES OF SOL WILL CHAR YOU INTO NOTHING MORE THAN A WEAK BLACK MARK ACROSS THE GROUND.
That tends to shut them up pretty good.
If we're wrong, then God has a lot of apologizing to do.
Pascal is screaming in hell "The house always wins!"
Quote from: "LikelyToBreak"My answer is, "Better to burn in hell for eternity than have to worship that genocidal, baby killing, slave driving, jealous, homophobic, hypocritical bastard of a God even one time, which the holy bible teaches about." :evil:
But, some of your guys answers are pretty good too. I especially like FrankDK's quoting of scripture to show them their own hypocrisy. =D>
I christians are right I'd gladly spend eternity in hell over spending eternity as some maniacal totalitarian deity's mindless minion.
I find it particularly ironic that THEISTS would use this as an argument since I became an atheist by being a christian who asked himself that same question. Like most theist arguments it only damages their position.
IF I were wrong and after my death I found myself somehow alive and before a deity of some kind my first question would be, "who are you?" Mankind has worshipped over 4,000 gods of some sort, and besides that it could be a god no man has ever worshipped (having kept all evidence of his existence secret from humanity). I would want only as I have ever wanted; to
know.
What if I'm wrong? Well, then, I'm wrong, and whose fault is that? It isn't MY fault if the world looks the way I would expect it to look if no God, or gods, existed. If it turns out that one does, and it wants to punish me for not believing, then that is the epitome of injustice. It should have made more of an effort to show itself to humanity so that we could all know it existed. Certainly, it should not have relied on preachers, priests, ministers, gurus, shamans, televangelists, gospel writers, and the like to relay information about the god we are supposed to believe in--doing the job imperfectly at best, and getting everything horribly wrong at worst. With billions of people believing in so many different doctrines, deities, and holy writings, how the hell am I supposed to know which god (//http://www.godchecker.com/) is the real deal?
I agree with most of all that is said, but I must argue with the responses saying, "I've done good, been a good person, therefor I have nothing to fear."
Done good by who? Your society? The culture acception and definition of good? And while we're on that, what is good?
No, you do not need to be "good" in this life. There are very few universally accepted morals, most of which come down to, "don't fuck with other people." I suppose if you've lived a life that has had little negative impact on others then it can be deemed as good, but even then what for?
There will be religions that don't exist get, dictating rules we do not know of yet. Maybe there is one true religion, and it's doctrine consists of being a complete asshole and only the strongest will survive. Only those who have done everything to get to the top will go to their form of heaven.
In this form of "pasgal's wager," everything goes. No, you don't have to be societally good, not at all.
Though you probably should be, because people hate dicks.
Quote from: "mykcob4"Quote from: "ZachyFTW"The question that I get asked by Christians mostly. This is their way of trying to scare me into believing the bullshit laced text that is all religion. I usually just say "What if 2 plus 2 didn't equal 4", to which they usually respond "But it does." which sets me up for a highly cocky "EXACTLY". I've been thinking a lot lately about what I would say if all the bullshit was actually true. What would I say if the second after I died I was talking to God. I'd probably ask why shit on earth is so fucked up. War, hunger, sickness, Rush Limbaugh, etc... Christians do have a good point if you look past all the horseshit for a second. If they're right I'm fucked, but if I'm right not shit happens to them. I think I'll take my chances :rollin:
We get this question on the forum all the time. "What if you're wrong, isn't better to be safe than sorry?" It's a nonstarter. The thing is there is a multitude of what ifs. In the Marine Corps we have a statement for what ifs. "What if grasshoppers had .45s, then birds wouldn't fuck with them." What if there is a purple cow running everything and YOU christians are praying to the wrong thing? I don't buy this better to be safe than sorry crap. In my college speech class a particular young girl gave a speech that amounted to: "We should all follow god's rule because society would be better off. We should teach our children to be good christians because society would be better off." I put it to her that society has been teaching that crap for centuries and it hasn't produced better societies. There is no god's rule, only rules made up by people saying that some god has dictated it. She was pissed.
I think, no I know the best thing is for people to use logic and understanding to make up their own mind. That the god theory has no basis in fact or logic. That the theist have to brainwash children to perpetuate their nonsense.
Lol, imagine a world where all atheists converted to Christianity due to the utility argument. It would be the same day that pigs evolved wings and started to fly around churches.
i'd still rather spend time in heaven with a genocidal narcissistic paranoid totalitarian than go to hell. except it's impossible to know what that crazy motherfucker will do next, what if during the eternity he decides for people to switch places? you can't know he won't do that, or something more unpredictable. if life on earth failed spectacularly, what can prevent heaven and hell from failing and needing a backup plan? maybe gods master plan is eternally layered? each layer capriciously revealed one by one after aeons of dying, in dread and hope of the next state of being.
Quotei'd still rather spend time in heaven with a genocidal narcissistic paranoid totalitarian than go to hell.
I'm not even sure I'd be able to detect the difference. Both last forever, and both sound horrible.
Quote from: "WitchSabrina"What if I'm wrong?
Been saying this for years and years:
If the pagans are right - I'm going to have a great next lifetime cause I worked damn hard to be a good person during this one. Karma is my friend. I am good to go!
If the christians are right - that's ok too. For I'd stack my life against a pious christian any day of the week. My life speaks for itself. And I've a few questions for the man in the sky anyway. I am good to go!
And if the atheists are right - I'm still good to go. Cause I leave lots of good behind me.
It just doesn't matter. If you put your head on your pillow at night knowing you did your best as much as possible - any afterlife or none atall is just fine any way you slice it!!! :-D
thanks Thump!
Quote from: "Plu"I'm not even sure I'd be able to detect the difference. Both last forever, and both sound horrible.
yeah but at least i'd be doped up or something eternally, too. and that's how mortal dickheads endure each other.
After so many events in my life that were a living hell, I can't think of anything worse than not being able to die. Life is experience good and bad, and death is no experience good or bad. In my opinion. As we get older life becomes harder and harder with the loss of so many friends, pets, loved ones, physical and maybe mental problems, and so much injustice to innocent people. This reality is why people believe in heaven and hell, and hope that cruel people get punished in the after life which is absured. :cry: :evil: Solitary
"What if you're wrong?" should be extended to "What if you're wrong about this thing that my religion made up so it could sell itself as a cure for something that doesn't exist?"