Text only | Text with Images

Atheistforums.com

Arts and Entertainment => Tell a Joke or two => Topic started by: The Skeletal Atheist on September 15, 2015, 09:00:37 PM

Title: ITT: We Use Fucked Up Logic To Prove Stupid Points
Post by: The Skeletal Atheist on September 15, 2015, 09:00:37 PM
I'll start -

Charles Darwin freed the slaves:

Abraham Lincoln is commonly known as the man who freed the slaves.

Charles Darwin was born in the same day that Abraham Lincoln was.

Lincoln had a beard.

Darwin had a beard.

Abraham Lincoln and Charles Darwin have never been seen in the same room together.

THEREFORE

Charles Darwin is Abraham Lincoln

AND THUS

Charles Darwin freed the slaves.

Title: Re: ITT: We Use Fucked Up Logic To Prove Stupid Points
Post by: kilodelta on September 16, 2015, 02:42:28 PM
100% of those that wear turtleneck sweaters die.  These sweaters wrap around the neck unlike other types of sweaters. The cessation of breathing is part of death. Therefore, turtleneck sweaters kill.

We should ban all turtleneck sweaters.
Title: Re: ITT: We Use Fucked Up Logic To Prove Stupid Points
Post by: dtq123 on September 16, 2015, 08:31:38 PM
Proving God is a Girl.

If:
God is real
Then:
God would leave a sign

If:
God would leave a sign
Then:
It's obviously in Japan

If:
The Sign is Obviously in Japan
Then:
That sign must look like tits

If:
That sign must be tits
Then:
http://i0.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/695/966/002.gif
Therefore God is a girl
Title: Re: ITT: We Use Fucked Up Logic To Prove Stupid Points
Post by: peacewithoutgod on September 17, 2015, 06:34:21 PM
If the bible is the word of god, then the bible is true.

In the bible, its authors claim to be writing for an almighty god, who was so mighty he couldn't learn to write it for himself.

The above makes the bible the word of god, therefore the bible is true!
Title: Re: ITT: We Use Fucked Up Logic To Prove Stupid Points
Post by: josephpalazzo on September 17, 2015, 06:36:41 PM
It's either Saturday or you're in Paris.

It's not Saturday

Therefore you are in Paris.
Title: Re: ITT: We Use Fucked Up Logic To Prove Stupid Points
Post by: TomFoolery on September 17, 2015, 08:54:42 PM
I feel compelled to throw famous advertising slogans and jingles under the bus, but it seems too easy.
1. Red Bull gives you wings. There are billions of species on the planet with wings. Therefore, Red Bull is responsible for a significant development of evolution. Therefore, Creationism is false.
2. I love the fishes 'cause they're so delicious. Therefore I don't love anything that isn't delicious. This is making my relationship with my family rather strained.
3. Disneyland is the happiest place on earth. A measles outbreak occurred at Disneyland. Therefore, extreme happiness causes measles.

Title: Re: ITT: We Use Fucked Up Logic To Prove Stupid Points
Post by: doorknob on September 19, 2015, 01:45:03 PM
This actually isn't funny but here goes.

Mr castle is a teacher that my son idolizes. Apparently Mr castle is a genius. Mr castle is successful proving that he is a genius. Mr castle made the class watch a documentary about how creationism is true. It was a documentary there for every thing in the documentary is fact making creationism true.

there you go logic as told by my son. True story.
Text only | Text with Images