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The True Story Behind Adam and Eve

Started by Raven, July 15, 2014, 03:48:09 AM

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Raven

Adam and Eve were sitting in the garden. “Damn it, the sun is burning my genitals” Adam said and he wrapped an apron of fig leaves around his waist. Eve, never having an opinion of her own, did the same. Then they went for a walk.

Halfway they came across a snake. Before the animal could utter a word - which would have been odd anyhow - Adam grabbed the snake and bit its head off. “There” he said. “Here, have an apple for dessert” Eve suggested.

God, apparently rather fond of his apples, got furious and commanded: “Get out of my garden you two! Adam you are going to work for the rest of your life, and Eve you are going to bear children”.

Naturally this wasn't much to their liking. Yet after a long debate on whether they had free will or not, they conceded to the judgement. Adam found a respectable job in the porn-industry and Eve brought forth a multitude of offspring (between whom things did not always run so smoothly, but that's another story).

DunkleSeele


DunkleSeele

I don't mind the story, it's just that this section is for new members to introduce themselves.

By the way, when a staff member writes in black text, he's speaking as a regular member.

Welcome anyway, and please tell us something about yourself.

Nam

Quote from: DunkleSeele on July 15, 2014, 04:17:51 AM
I don't mind the story, it's just that this section is for new members to introduce themselves.

By the way, when a staff member writes in black text, he's speaking as a regular member.

Welcome anyway, and please tell us something about yourself.

(cough) phattmatt/frosty (cough).

-Nam
Mad cow disease...it's not just for cows, or the mad!

stromboli

Raven PM'd me about my sig. Apparently never heard of Douglas Adams.

QuoteReality is that which, if you stop believing in it, doesn't go away??? I don't know the guy who wrote that, but he must have lived a long time ago. Nowadays we don't use subject-object ideas any more. You cannot divide between reality and belief, they are intertwined with each other.

Troll.

Solitary

There's no telling what comes out of primordial ooze, but it all smells the same..  :pidu: Solitary
There is nothing more frightful than ignorance in action.

stromboli

I had a round of posts with Truth8874 and left out of boredom. The fact that Raven Pm'ed me particularly this morning makes me think they are the same people.

Mary mandilin

#7
You kids and your games!  Have fun with that! 

Solitary

We do have fun! We aren't restricted by religious dogma to deprive ourselves, and we don't get butt fucked by priests like you obviously have, the trademark of a troll is childhood sexual abuse. We pray you get help, but we know it doesn't work on sinners like you. Have a nice day!  :rotflmao: Solitary
There is nothing more frightful than ignorance in action.

Raven

I googled Douglas Adams and I have had his book The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy in my hands once, but if that's where you guys collect your information, then I am in the wrong place here. I do not take any atheist seriously unless they have read and understood Nietzsche. Does any of you practice a phenomenological method at all?

Raven

PS Your suspicion that Truth8874 and me are the same person is false

stromboli

Whatever. You are making decisions about us based on very little information. If Nietzsche is your only source of philosophy, then you have a very narrow focus. That all adds up to a narrow minded, judgmental individual. Or a troll who happened to look up Nietzsche before they came here. Either way you are not someone I find particularly interesting.

Hijiri Byakuren

Quote from: Raven on July 15, 2014, 02:27:55 PMI do not take any atheist seriously unless they have read and understood Nietzsche.
I do not take anyone seriously who thinks Nietzsche is the end-all be-all of philosophy.
Black lives matter, feminism is good, religion is bullshit, and if you disagree with me on any of these points you are a fucking moron.<br /><br />Sargon The Grape - My Youtube Channel

stromboli

The fact that you chose to PM me personally- and apparently no one else- before I even knew you were on the forum and comment on my sig, tends to say you had me in your sights for some reason. In any case, don't PM me again. And don't expect friendship on here.

AllPurposeAtheist

Yeah, people sure make ya feel all welcome n shit don't they?
Of course telling lame jokes in your intro thread and PMing "total strangers" about their signature line and telling atheists the only philosophy worth bothering with is Nietzsche isn't like totally rav man.
Let's start over shall we? Go away and try again except skipping the later part of that.
All hail my new signature!

Admit it. You're secretly green with envy.