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Arts and Entertainment => Tell a Joke or two => Topic started by: blargg on May 01, 2014, 08:21:47 AM

Title: The reality about atheïsts
Post by: blargg on May 01, 2014, 08:21:47 AM
Shocking facts hit the news less then a year ago. In Stockholm atheïst suicicide bombers killed 18 agnostics over their worldviews:

QuoteSTOCKHOLM -In a frightening display of rising sectarian violence, an atheist suicide bomber blew himself up on a busy street in Stockholm three days ago; killing eighteen agnostics and wounding over thirty.  Members of the ‘Swedish Atheistic Liberation Front’ (SALF) have claimed responsibility for the bombing. Declaring the attack as revenge against the explosive agnostic riots, which, last week, hospitalized several atheists and terrorized the atheistic community.

Swedish authorities have so far failed stem the rising levels of violence and growing sectarian divide. The prime minister of Sweden Fredrik Reinfeldt, himself an agnostic, strongly condemned the attack, yet also called for restraint among the broader agnostic community.  In an impromptu speech, the prime minister called on agnostics to not contribute to the violence, or launch vengeful vigilante attacks, saying that the proper authorities would see justice done.

Yet Mr. Reinfeldt’s message seems to be falling on deaf ears, prominent agnostic leaders and bloggers have already began urging retaliatory attacks in what is an ominous sign for the future of sectarian violence in Sweden. Sectarian divisions and violence have been increasing ever since the breakdown in talks between the mostly agnostic Government and the violently separatist SALF.

SALF, and the atheists they claim to represent, believe that there is no god, agnostics believe that there may not be a god. To outsiders, this difference in doctrine seems almost irrelevant; to believers it is a question of life or death. Therefore, such a small difference in doctrine can create such explosive hatreds, divisions and violence.

The spiraling violence has already purged once religiously diverse neighborhoods into homogenous sectarian strongholds of either atheists or agnostics. Strongholds, which, since the latest SALF terrorism, have begun exchanging nightly mortar fire in the escalating conflict that Swedish authorities seem unable to contain.

So far the United Nations response has been limited to broad condemnations of the violence from both sides; while Norway and Finland have been preparing for an influx of refugees and planning for the creation of possible peacekeeping buffer zones within Sweden in case the rising violence transforms into the civil war many expect. The United States, afraid of being embroiled in a long intractable conflict, have confined their involvement to verbal support for moderates on both sides of the sectarian divide. At this point, all one can do is put in concentrated thought that Sweden’s Atheists and Agnostics can reconcile before civil war breaks out and, together, realize the dream of one united Sweden.

Source: http://thelapine.ca/atheist-suicide-bomber-kills-eighteen-agnostics-0/ (http://thelapine.ca/atheist-suicide-bomber-kills-eighteen-agnostics-0/)


The article was ofcourse discussed on the christian 'side' of the internet, drawing the following conclusions (among others):

QuoteAtheists are dangerous demons, completely immoral, and ready to commit violence!
QuoteIt just goes to show that these are savage beasts who are willing to kill each other over whether their particular brand of magical thinking is the right kind or not.
QuoteIs it really a surprise to anyone that an atheist would go around killing people? They have no absolute moral standard, guidelines or rules. A rule created by a child molester is just as valid as a rule created by anyone else under an atheistic worldview.

Source: http://www.landoverbaptist.net/showthread.php?t=93408 (http://www.landoverbaptist.net/showthread.php?t=93408)

Checkmate atheïsts!!
Title: Re: The reality about atheïsts
Post by: Hakurei Reimu on May 01, 2014, 08:26:14 AM
Disgusting! Atheism should be outlawed!

...

OH SNAP!!

(Both the Lapine and landoverbaptist are satire sites.)
Title: Re: The reality about atheïsts
Post by: SGOS on May 01, 2014, 08:40:45 AM
At first, I thought it was an Onion article, but I see it's Landover Baptist.  I like the part about mortar fire being exchanged between neighborhoods.  That paints an interesting picture.  After dinner of lutefisk, go out a fire off a few rounds of mortar fire, and then go back in and enjoy some pepparkakor cookies.
Title: Re: The reality about atheïsts
Post by: Jason78 on May 01, 2014, 08:46:14 AM
Quote from: Hakurei Reimu on May 01, 2014, 08:26:14 AM
Disgusting! Atheism should be outlawed!

In some countries it already is.   Why wont Sweden follow the example set by more progressive countries like the UAE, Qatar or Yemen? 
Title: Re: The reality about atheïsts
Post by: Hydra009 on May 01, 2014, 09:14:54 AM
This just supports what I've been telling you guys for years.  Naturalism is not only factually incorrect, but harmful to humanity.  It teaches us to uncritically accept pretty dubious if not outright falsified beliefs and to live our lives by the dictates of irreligious authorities.  Most of these poor Norweigians grew up with atheism indoctrinated into them, barely know anything of any other belief system, and are encouraged to fight others who don't share their beliefs.  The violence will only end with the beliefs that sustain it.

Look, we all know about the existence of God and magic, there's plenty of empirical evidence for it.  Why lie to ourselves about how the world really is?

We can do better.  Humanity can do better.
Title: Re: The reality about atheïsts
Post by: Solitary on May 01, 2014, 10:56:29 AM
 :rotflmao:
QuoteLandover Baptist Church makes reasonable efforts to include accurate and up to date information on this website,
Yeah, right! This made my day for the comments from people that don't have a clue it is satire.  :doh: Solitary
Title: Re: The reality about atheïsts
Post by: Feral Atheist on May 01, 2014, 11:37:20 AM
Really?  This is being discussed?  Why?

The Lapine is Canada’s version of The Onion â€" but nicer
Calgary's Steve Boyd has a knack for getting people to believe the unbelievable
Title: Re: The reality about atheïsts
Post by: Hydra009 on May 01, 2014, 11:45:39 AM
Quote from: Feral Atheist on May 01, 2014, 11:37:20 AMReally?  This is being discussed?  Why?
Humor.  At the expensive of the "militant atheist" idea.