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Vyrian Forum Leader


Joined: 03 Nov 2007 Posts: 1079 Local time: 12:09 AM Location: K-PAX

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Posted: Mon Jan 28, 2008 11:42 pm Post subject: Your Momma's so Christian that... |
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Let's invent a new line of Your Momma jokes. Or "Your so Christian" jokes.
It can go for other religions to, but I've mainly only thought of Christian ones.
example.
Your momma's so Christian she thinks bats are birds!
Your momma's so Christian she thinks evolution is when bugs start coming out from her pubic hair.
Your momma's so Christian she thinks two plus two equals the Devil!
Your momma's so Christian she begs to christ to help her take a shit.
You're so Christian you jacked off to Passion of the Christ.
You're so Christian you think it's a sin to tell on your priest after he fingered you and the other alter boys.
You're so Christian you thought Tyrannosaurus was a rip off of Godzilla.
You're so Christian you carry an extra pair of earplugs to school for science, biology, math, and history class.
So what ones can you come up with? _________________

Last edited by Vyrian on Tue Jan 29, 2008 12:06 am; edited 1 time in total |
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Enemy_of_Real1ty Graphic Terrorist

Joined: 23 Jan 2008 Posts: 217 Local time: 12:09 AM Location: us
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icandothefrug Intern


Joined: 27 Jan 2008 Posts: 25 Local time: 9:09 PM

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Posted: Tue Jan 29, 2008 12:01 am Post subject: |
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Sorry to be a nitpicky, but it's "your mama," not "you're mama." "Your" shows possession, while "you're" is a contraction for "you are."
Brought to you by the grammar polizei. |
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Vyrian Forum Leader


Joined: 03 Nov 2007 Posts: 1079 Local time: 12:09 AM Location: K-PAX

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Posted: Tue Jan 29, 2008 12:07 am Post subject: |
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| icandothefrug wrote: | Sorry to be a nitpicky, but it's "your mama," not "you're mama." "Your" shows possession, while "you're" is a contraction for "you are."
Brought to you by the grammar polizei. |
Agreed, thank you for helping me notice that typo. _________________
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Gettin' In Tune Forum Master


Joined: 03 Aug 2007 Posts: 2545 Local time: 12:09 AM
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Posted: Tue Jan 29, 2008 12:10 am Post subject: Re: Your Momma's so Christian that... |
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| Vyrian wrote: | | Your momma's so Christian she begs to christ to help her take a shit. |
And prays to jesus to wipe her ass if she is out of toilet paper. |
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icandothefrug Intern


Joined: 27 Jan 2008 Posts: 25 Local time: 9:09 PM

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Posted: Tue Jan 29, 2008 12:15 am Post subject: |
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| Vyrian wrote: | | icandothefrug wrote: | Sorry to be a nitpicky, but it's "your mama," not "you're mama." "Your" shows possession, while "you're" is a contraction for "you are."
Brought to you by the grammar polizei. |
Agreed, thank you for helping me notice that typo. |
You are very welcome. |
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JarrardC. Forum Plebian

Joined: 15 Sep 2007 Posts: 188 Local time: 12:09 AM

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Posted: Tue Jan 29, 2008 6:32 am Post subject: |
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Yo momma's so christian, she thought that the bees and birds were evidence for god.
Yo momma's so christian, she hasn't even read her own bible.
Yo momma's so christian, she thinks atheist are immoral yet christians make up 70% of the prison system.
Yo momma's so christian, she thinks someone surviving cancer is a miracle but yet willfully and ignorantly ignores the other millions of cancer patients that do die to cancer. 1/1,000,000.
Yo momma's so christian, she wants to force her beleifs on the public school system.
Yo momma's so christian, that she joined the west boro church.
Yo momma's so christian, that even if some one today claimed to be jesus, not even she would beleive it, get offended, and demands he gets crucified.
Yo momma's so christian, that she thinks being mean is unchristian-like, even when the definition of christian is a believer in the christian god. Morals and niceness really has no connection to christianity at all.
Yo momma's so christian, that she thinks god is all loving and merciful, even after god supposedly flooded the whole world, killing millions, and demanding murder.
Yo momma's so christian, that she think we are too unworthy to understand god or even be in contact, but yet, some how some way some old geiser in 2350987230 AC wrote the bible and was able to some how know that god is all merciful, all powerful, all knowing.. He some how knew how god created create and in what order he created things.. He some how knew that the earth was created in seven days.
Yo momma's so christian, that she thinks the bible was written by those who have witnessed jesus, but really, the bible was written long after jesus was dead.
Yo momma's so christian, that she's an ignorant dumb ass. End. |
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Enemy_of_Real1ty Graphic Terrorist

Joined: 23 Jan 2008 Posts: 217 Local time: 12:09 AM Location: us
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Mr_C Reckoner

Joined: 26 Jun 2006 Posts: 6594 Local time: 10:09 PM Location: Pale Blue Dot

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Posted: Tue Jan 29, 2008 3:27 pm Post subject: |
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Your momma's so Christian, she claims to be "married to Jesus" ever since her third husband left her. _________________ "If we long to believe that the stars rise and set for us, that we are the reason there is a Universe, does science do us a disservice in deflating our conceits?"
Carl Sagan
The Atheist Forums Rules
Summary: Just play nice, mmkay? |
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josephpalazzo Illusion Master

Joined: 30 Aug 2006 Posts: 8036 Local time: 12:09 AM Location: D-brane
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Posted: Tue Jan 29, 2008 3:38 pm Post subject: |
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| Yo Mamma's so christian that when you wish her Happy Holidays, she weeps... |
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PJS

Joined: 25 Apr 2004 Posts: 937 Local time: 12:09 AM Location: Clearwater,Fl.
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Posted: Tue Jan 29, 2008 3:57 pm Post subject: |
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Yo Mamma's so Christian she turns the other cheek more than Richard Simmons.
Yo Mamma's so Christian she still listens to old Dan Barker records.
Yo Mamma's so Christian she wants to repeal the 22nd Amendment in time for the next presidential election. _________________ The path of least resistance and least trouble is a mental rut already made. It requires troublesome work to undertake the alternation of old beliefs.
-John Dewey |
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Chris Johnston Intern


Joined: 27 Dec 2007 Posts: 51 Local time: 12:09 AM
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Posted: Wed Jan 30, 2008 12:41 pm Post subject: |
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Yo Mama's so Christian, she won't fuck standing up because someone might think she was dancing!
Yo Mama's so Christian, she'll sleep with anyone...then cry about it!
Yo Mama's so Christian, she only swallows so as not to spill the seed.
Yo Mama's so Christian, she's glad to tell others they are going to Hell.
Yo Mama's so Christian, she makes sure she watches out for everyone else's sins.
Yo Mama's so Christian, if her pastor told her to get on her knees, she would, but not to pray.
Yo Mama's so Christian, her mouth is pinched into a permanent sniff.
Yo Mama's so Christian, she has learned to turn off her brain, personality, and sexuality.
Yo Mama's so Christian, she makes sure she keeps Daddy's balls locked up.
Yo Mama's so Christian, she just knows your sister is a total slut. Yo sista is so Christian, she IS a total slut. Hot, too. Nice lips. Tight ass.
Yo Mama's so Christian, the last time she liked anything, she repented of it.
Yo Mama's so Christian, her vagina has healed over.
<rim> _________________ Faith in Action Blog
Sashi-no-eda bonsai blog |
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Hit_me_up024 Forum Master


Joined: 25 Dec 2007 Posts: 2351 Local time: 12:09 AM Location: My parents basement.

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Posted: Wed Jan 30, 2008 12:55 pm Post subject: |
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lol _________________ KILL the pancake
Props to Enemy_of_Reality |
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