The Infidel Guy Show
The Debate Hour Show

Faith and Freethought
3 Podcasts, One Feed

or visit this page.


FAQFAQ    SearchSearch    MemberlistMemberlist    UsergroupsUsergroups    RegisterRegister   
 ProfileProfile   Log in to check your private messagesLog in to check your private messages   Log inLog in 
 VideoRoom and ChatLive Video and Chat Room   The Infidel Guy's Video RoomFreethought Videos
BlogsBlogs    My BlogWeblogs News


Embed Our Player

~ TIP JAR ~


Your Momma's so Christian that...

 
Post new topic   Reply to topic    AtheistForums.com Forum Index -> Tell a Joke or two
View previous topic :: View next topic  
Author Message
Vyrian
Forum Leader
Forum Leader


Joined: 03 Nov 2007
Posts: 1079
Local time: 12:09 AM
Location: K-PAX
ja.gif

PostPosted: Mon Jan 28, 2008 11:42 pm    Post subject: Your Momma's so Christian that... Add User to Ignore List Reply with quote

Let's invent a new line of Your Momma jokes. Or "Your so Christian" jokes.

It can go for other religions to, but I've mainly only thought of Christian ones.

example.


Your momma's so Christian she thinks bats are birds!
Your momma's so Christian she thinks evolution is when bugs start coming out from her pubic hair.
Your momma's so Christian she thinks two plus two equals the Devil!
Your momma's so Christian she begs to christ to help her take a shit.

You're so Christian you jacked off to Passion of the Christ.
You're so Christian you think it's a sin to tell on your priest after he fingered you and the other alter boys.
You're so Christian you thought Tyrannosaurus was a rip off of Godzilla.
You're so Christian you carry an extra pair of earplugs to school for science, biology, math, and history class.


So what ones can you come up with?
_________________


Last edited by Vyrian on Tue Jan 29, 2008 12:06 am; edited 1 time in total
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message AIM Address MSN Messenger
Enemy_of_Real1ty
Graphic Terrorist


Joined: 23 Jan 2008
Posts: 217
Local time: 12:09 AM
Location: us

PostPosted: Mon Jan 28, 2008 11:47 pm    Post subject: Add User to Ignore List Reply with quote

Your mamma's so christian shes got knee Calluses.
_________________

My Blog: http://www.atheistforums.com/weblog.php?w=31
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Blog Visit poster's website AIM Address MSN Messenger
icandothefrug
Intern
Intern


Joined: 27 Jan 2008
Posts: 25
Local time: 9:09 PM

us.gif

PostPosted: Tue Jan 29, 2008 12:01 am    Post subject: Add User to Ignore List Reply with quote

Sorry to be a nitpicky, but it's "your mama," not "you're mama." "Your" shows possession, while "you're" is a contraction for "you are."

Brought to you by the grammar polizei.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Blog Visit poster's website
Vyrian
Forum Leader
Forum Leader


Joined: 03 Nov 2007
Posts: 1079
Local time: 12:09 AM
Location: K-PAX
ja.gif

PostPosted: Tue Jan 29, 2008 12:07 am    Post subject: Add User to Ignore List Reply with quote

icandothefrug wrote:
Sorry to be a nitpicky, but it's "your mama," not "you're mama." "Your" shows possession, while "you're" is a contraction for "you are."

Brought to you by the grammar polizei.


Agreed, thank you for helping me notice that typo.
_________________
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message AIM Address MSN Messenger
Gettin' In Tune
Forum Master
Forum Master


Joined: 03 Aug 2007
Posts: 2545
Local time: 12:09 AM

PostPosted: Tue Jan 29, 2008 12:10 am    Post subject: Re: Your Momma's so Christian that... Add User to Ignore List Reply with quote

Vyrian wrote:
Your momma's so Christian she begs to christ to help her take a shit.


And prays to jesus to wipe her ass if she is out of toilet paper.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
icandothefrug
Intern
Intern


Joined: 27 Jan 2008
Posts: 25
Local time: 9:09 PM

us.gif

PostPosted: Tue Jan 29, 2008 12:15 am    Post subject: Add User to Ignore List Reply with quote

Vyrian wrote:
icandothefrug wrote:
Sorry to be a nitpicky, but it's "your mama," not "you're mama." "Your" shows possession, while "you're" is a contraction for "you are."

Brought to you by the grammar polizei.


Agreed, thank you for helping me notice that typo.


You are very welcome.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Blog Visit poster's website
JarrardC.
Forum Plebian
Forum Plebian


Joined: 15 Sep 2007
Posts: 188
Local time: 12:09 AM

as.gif

PostPosted: Tue Jan 29, 2008 6:32 am    Post subject: Add User to Ignore List Reply with quote

Yo momma's so christian, she thought that the bees and birds were evidence for god.
Yo momma's so christian, she hasn't even read her own bible.
Yo momma's so christian, she thinks atheist are immoral yet christians make up 70% of the prison system.
Yo momma's so christian, she thinks someone surviving cancer is a miracle but yet willfully and ignorantly ignores the other millions of cancer patients that do die to cancer. 1/1,000,000.
Yo momma's so christian, she wants to force her beleifs on the public school system.
Yo momma's so christian, that she joined the west boro church.
Yo momma's so christian, that even if some one today claimed to be jesus, not even she would beleive it, get offended, and demands he gets crucified.
Yo momma's so christian, that she thinks being mean is unchristian-like, even when the definition of christian is a believer in the christian god. Morals and niceness really has no connection to christianity at all.
Yo momma's so christian, that she thinks god is all loving and merciful, even after god supposedly flooded the whole world, killing millions, and demanding murder.
Yo momma's so christian, that she think we are too unworthy to understand god or even be in contact, but yet, some how some way some old geiser in 2350987230 AC wrote the bible and was able to some how know that god is all merciful, all powerful, all knowing.. He some how knew how god created create and in what order he created things.. He some how knew that the earth was created in seven days.
Yo momma's so christian, that she thinks the bible was written by those who have witnessed jesus, but really, the bible was written long after jesus was dead.
Yo momma's so christian, that she's an ignorant dumb ass. End.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Enemy_of_Real1ty
Graphic Terrorist


Joined: 23 Jan 2008
Posts: 217
Local time: 12:09 AM
Location: us

PostPosted: Tue Jan 29, 2008 3:12 pm    Post subject: Add User to Ignore List Reply with quote

Yo Mamma's so christian she believes the earth is only 6500 years old.
_________________

My Blog: http://www.atheistforums.com/weblog.php?w=31
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Blog Visit poster's website AIM Address MSN Messenger
Mr_C
Reckoner


Joined: 26 Jun 2006
Posts: 6594
Local time: 10:09 PM
Location: Pale Blue Dot
us.gif

PostPosted: Tue Jan 29, 2008 3:27 pm    Post subject: Add User to Ignore List Reply with quote

Your momma's so Christian, she claims to be "married to Jesus" ever since her third husband left her.
_________________
"If we long to believe that the stars rise and set for us, that we are the reason there is a Universe, does science do us a disservice in deflating our conceits?"
Carl Sagan




The Atheist Forums Rules
Summary: Just play nice, mmkay?
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Visit poster's website
josephpalazzo
Illusion Master


Joined: 30 Aug 2006
Posts: 8036
Local time: 12:09 AM
Location: D-brane

PostPosted: Tue Jan 29, 2008 3:38 pm    Post subject: Add User to Ignore List Reply with quote

Yo Mamma's so christian that when you wish her Happy Holidays, she weeps...
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Blog
PJS



Joined: 25 Apr 2004
Posts: 937
Local time: 12:09 AM
Location: Clearwater,Fl.

PostPosted: Tue Jan 29, 2008 3:57 pm    Post subject: Add User to Ignore List Reply with quote

Yo Mamma's so Christian she turns the other cheek more than Richard Simmons.

Yo Mamma's so Christian she still listens to old Dan Barker records.

Yo Mamma's so Christian she wants to repeal the 22nd Amendment in time for the next presidential election.
_________________
The path of least resistance and least trouble is a mental rut already made. It requires troublesome work to undertake the alternation of old beliefs.
-John Dewey
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Chris Johnston
Intern
Intern


Joined: 27 Dec 2007
Posts: 51
Local time: 12:09 AM

PostPosted: Wed Jan 30, 2008 12:41 pm    Post subject: Add User to Ignore List Reply with quote

Yo Mama's so Christian, she won't fuck standing up because someone might think she was dancing!
Yo Mama's so Christian, she'll sleep with anyone...then cry about it!
Yo Mama's so Christian, she only swallows so as not to spill the seed.
Yo Mama's so Christian, she's glad to tell others they are going to Hell.
Yo Mama's so Christian, she makes sure she watches out for everyone else's sins.
Yo Mama's so Christian, if her pastor told her to get on her knees, she would, but not to pray.
Yo Mama's so Christian, her mouth is pinched into a permanent sniff.
Yo Mama's so Christian, she has learned to turn off her brain, personality, and sexuality.
Yo Mama's so Christian, she makes sure she keeps Daddy's balls locked up.
Yo Mama's so Christian, she just knows your sister is a total slut. Yo sista is so Christian, she IS a total slut. Hot, too. Nice lips. Tight ass.
Yo Mama's so Christian, the last time she liked anything, she repented of it.
Yo Mama's so Christian, her vagina has healed over.

<rim>
_________________
Faith in Action Blog

Sashi-no-eda bonsai blog
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Hit_me_up024
Forum Master
Forum Master


Joined: 25 Dec 2007
Posts: 2351
Local time: 12:09 AM
Location: My parents basement.
us.gif

PostPosted: Wed Jan 30, 2008 12:55 pm    Post subject: Add User to Ignore List Reply with quote

lol
_________________
KILL the pancake


Props to Enemy_of_Reality
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail Visit poster's website
Display posts from previous:   
Post new topic   Reply to topic    AtheistForums.com Forum Index -> Tell a Joke or two All times are GMT - 5 Hours
Page 1 of 1

 
Jump to:  
You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum


Powered by phpBB © 2001, 2005 phpBB Group
Mobile Phones - McDonalds - Big Brother 9 - Mobile Phones - Northern Rock
phpBB SEO