Joined: 29 Jun 2004 Posts: 15983 Local time: 3:28 AM Location: Denver Colorado.
Posted: Fri Sep 28, 2007 8:19 pm Post subject:
da_monumental_1 wrote:
It's like last week, I got a call from a potential customer asking me, "Hey, do ya'll fix computers?" While the DBA I have for a business in another county is We Fix Computers!. I hung up the damn phone.
I don't get it? what did he do wrong? all he asked was if you fixed computers. why not simply say "yes we do"?
when I call people I often say "is so and so there?" I am picturing you being the smart aleck who says "of course (name) is here stupid, he/she's here every day!"
Joined: 27 Mar 2003 Posts: 692 Local time: 4:28 AM Location: Lumberton, NC
Posted: Fri Sep 28, 2007 8:57 pm Post subject:
The DBA (Doing Business As) and name of the storefront is We Fix Computers. If it's not that obvious, I don't want that person for a customer. From experience, those are they type who are more trouble than their worth.
Joined: 23 Mar 2006 Posts: 2799 Local time: 8:28 AM Location: Behind the computer
Posted: Sat Sep 29, 2007 10:25 am Post subject:
da_monumental_1 wrote:
The DBA (Doing Business As) and name of the storefront is We Fix Computers. If it's not that obvious, I don't want that person for a customer. From experience, those are they type who are more trouble than their worth.
I call it a preemptive Divorce The Customer.
I once went into a lamp shop, called "Lamp Shop" and in the store there were all sorts of lamps. First thing I said, with a grin: "I'm looking for a lamp". _________________ "The first principle is that you must not fool yourself - and you are the easiest person to fool" --- Richard P. Feynman
"Why not just make your null hypothesis be that..." - Philosophos
Joined: 18 Sep 2006 Posts: 4148 Local time: 8:28 AM Location: Dippin' my balls in it.
Posted: Sat Sep 29, 2007 10:47 am Post subject:
Sal1981 wrote:
da_monumental_1 wrote:
The DBA (Doing Business As) and name of the storefront is We Fix Computers. If it's not that obvious, I don't want that person for a customer. From experience, those are they type who are more trouble than their worth.
I call it a preemptive Divorce The Customer.
I once went into a lamp shop, called "Lamp Shop" and in the store there were all sorts of lamps. First thing I said, with a grin: "I'm looking for a lamp".
The flip side of that is when you walk into the "The Lamp Shop" and see the 500 wall lamps and table lamps and hanging lamps and a guy with a Lamp Shop name tag walks up and says: "May I help you with something?" Ummm....
"Why, yes! Do you sell toasters?!" _________________
Joined: 08 Mar 2007 Posts: 2754 Local time: 4:28 AM
Posted: Sat Sep 29, 2007 1:57 pm Post subject:
[quote="Zocrates"]
Specus_Meretricis wrote:
Just all the white people. You know how we all love to sit around and tell nigger jokes.
Nope, never did that either.[/quote
I'll cut to the chase:
Me: Yes you did,
You: No I didn't.
Me: *post links/quotes/etc*
You: Normally I speak the Queen's English perfectly in 98% of my post but for some odd reason, when it comes to saying things that can be taken as racist I claim..er..I mean I tend to revert to local vernacular and therefore my racist statements are not racist, just merely words mixed together to appear racist. Why you stupid fucking white people don't see that is beyond my ken.
Me: Douchebag
You: Fuck you!
Me: Nazi Jew Racist Scum!
You: I am your father!
Me: Nooooooooooo!
You: You just hate Darth Vader because he is black. _________________ Fuck you bitch!!! I told you the asparagus is in the freezer! - William Shatner
What do you call someone that doesn't laugh at asparagus jokes? A human being.
Joined: 07 Feb 2006 Posts: 2248 Local time: 3:28 AM Location: Cherry Hill, NJ
Posted: Sat Sep 29, 2007 9:26 pm Post subject:
Specus_Meretricis wrote:
Zocrates wrote:
Specus_Meretricis wrote:
Just all the white people. You know how we all love to sit around and tell nigger jokes.
Nope, never did that either.
I'll cut to the chase:
Me: I know you didn't call us racists and I know you're not a racist, but I just like fucking with you because I've got nothing better to do with my life than play an internetstigator (that's internet instigator for the rest of you). Oh, I and I'm also just all hot and bothered because I want your hot caramel body, but I've been scared to tell you all this time.
Fixed.
And yeah...I'm very flattered, but I'm taken. _________________ "Faith is often the boast of the man who is too lazy to investigate." - F.M. Knowles
"We only fear things in proportion to our ignorance of them" - Titus Livius
Joined: 02 Apr 2003 Posts: 12844 Local time: 12:28 AM Location: SoCal, USA
Posted: Mon Oct 01, 2007 6:51 pm Post subject:
da_monumental_1 wrote:
The DBA (Doing Business As) and name of the storefront is We Fix Computers. If it's not that obvious, I don't want that person for a customer. From experience, those are they type who are more trouble than their worth.
I call it a preemptive Divorce The Customer.
I have a few customers that I need to do that to. Why is it that the less they buy, and the cheaper stuff they buy, the more of a pain in the ass they are?! If a customer buys a $100/month software package from me, they're the easiest customers to deal with. When a customer buys a $9/month software package from me, they're the biggest pain in the ass! Complaints, problems, can't balance a checkbook with an electronic scale, pissy, bad attitude, take no responsibility for stupid decisions and expect everyone else to clean up the mess they made. I mean honestly, WTF?! Every time I deal with a $9/month customer, I want to tell them to hit the skids.
You know what's UBER crazy? The ones that get a free trial of our software are the HUGEST pains in the ass! How can you bitch about something that's f*ckin FREE?!?!?!?!?!
Joined: 29 Jun 2004 Posts: 15983 Local time: 3:28 AM Location: Denver Colorado.
Posted: Mon Oct 01, 2007 6:59 pm Post subject:
CET wrote:
da_monumental_1 wrote:
The DBA (Doing Business As) and name of the storefront is We Fix Computers. If it's not that obvious, I don't want that person for a customer. From experience, those are they type who are more trouble than their worth.
I call it a preemptive Divorce The Customer.
I have a few customers that I need to do that to. Why is it that the less they buy, and the cheaper stuff they buy, the more of a pain in the ass they are?! If a customer buys a $100/month software package from me, they're the easiest customers to deal with. When a customer buys a $9/month software package from me, they're the biggest pain in the ass! Complaints, problems, can't balance a checkbook with an electronic scale, pissy, bad attitude, take no responsibility for stupid decisions and expect everyone else to clean up the mess they made. I mean honestly, WTF?! Every time I deal with a $9/month customer, I want to tell them to hit the skids.
You know what's UBER crazy? The ones that get a free trial of our software are the HUGEST pains in the ass! How can you bitch about something that's f*ckin FREE?!?!?!?!?!
Joined: 02 Apr 2003 Posts: 12844 Local time: 12:28 AM Location: SoCal, USA
Posted: Mon Oct 01, 2007 7:26 pm Post subject:
hillbillyatheist wrote:
CET wrote:
da_monumental_1 wrote:
The DBA (Doing Business As) and name of the storefront is We Fix Computers. If it's not that obvious, I don't want that person for a customer. From experience, those are they type who are more trouble than their worth.
I call it a preemptive Divorce The Customer.
I have a few customers that I need to do that to. Why is it that the less they buy, and the cheaper stuff they buy, the more of a pain in the ass they are?! If a customer buys a $100/month software package from me, they're the easiest customers to deal with. When a customer buys a $9/month software package from me, they're the biggest pain in the ass! Complaints, problems, can't balance a checkbook with an electronic scale, pissy, bad attitude, take no responsibility for stupid decisions and expect everyone else to clean up the mess they made. I mean honestly, WTF?! Every time I deal with a $9/month customer, I want to tell them to hit the skids.
You know what's UBER crazy? The ones that get a free trial of our software are the HUGEST pains in the ass! How can you bitch about something that's f*ckin FREE?!?!?!?!?!
[/rant]
just thank them for finding chinks in your armor.
I had the same problem when I was the assistant manager of a department store. Cheap crap like gum was shoplifted all the time. Yet, I could set out a $3,000 plasma television next to the door and not have to worry about it. It would have been EASY to swipe that thing, and yet it never happened. People will swipe cheap crap, but not expensive stuff. Weird. _________________ Namaste,
CET
Joined: 08 Mar 2007 Posts: 2754 Local time: 4:28 AM
Posted: Tue Oct 02, 2007 4:53 am Post subject:
When I worked at Barnes and Noble a few years ago, this woman called and asked us "Do you sell milk?". When I told her "No, we just sell books and book related items" she then said "Well your Alderwood store sells milk!" and hung up. For some odd reason, that conversation has played over and over in my head....as if she said: If it wasn't for that horse, I wouldn't have spent that year at college. _________________ Fuck you bitch!!! I told you the asparagus is in the freezer! - William Shatner
What do you call someone that doesn't laugh at asparagus jokes? A human being.
Joined: 23 Mar 2006 Posts: 2799 Local time: 8:28 AM Location: Behind the computer
Posted: Tue Oct 02, 2007 7:49 am Post subject:
Specus_Meretricis wrote:
When I worked at Barnes and Noble a few years ago, this woman called and asked us "Do you sell milk?". When I told her "No, we just sell books and book related items" she then said "Well your Alderwood store sells milk!" and hung up. For some odd reason, that conversation has played over and over in my head....as if she said: If it wasn't for that horse, I wouldn't have spent that year at college.
Crazy people have the best memes. _________________ "The first principle is that you must not fool yourself - and you are the easiest person to fool" --- Richard P. Feynman
"Why not just make your null hypothesis be that..." - Philosophos
Joined: 23 Jan 2008 Posts: 217 Local time: 3:28 AM Location: us
Posted: Sat Jan 26, 2008 4:58 pm Post subject:
Quote:
You: Normally I speak the Queen's English perfectly in 98% of my post but for some odd reason, when it comes to saying things that can be taken as racist I claim..er..I mean I tend to revert to local vernacular and therefore my racist statements are not racist, just merely words mixed together to appear racist. Why you stupid fucking white people don't see that is beyond my ken.
joshuas3521 Nobody Expects the Spanish Inquisition!
Joined: 19 Dec 2007 Posts: 2236 Local time: 3:28 AM Location: Birmingham, Alabama
Posted: Sat Jan 26, 2008 6:30 pm Post subject:
da_monumental_1 wrote:
The DBA (Doing Business As) and name of the storefront is We Fix Computers. If it's not that obvious, I don't want that person for a customer. From experience, those are they type who are more trouble than their worth.
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sorry I couldn't resist! 
Weird.
